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Fanfiction > Angst > Grow Up > Author: IldreenL Hits: 813
Disclaimer: I've been named the Evil Queen. Still, that gives me no right over Gravitation... except playing with them and tourture them at the weirdest moments of my life.

A/N: I was told this resembled the song Comfortably Numb, by Pink Floyd, though I hadn't heard it at the time. I recomend you do.

Read and ENJOY!


Tatsuha hadn't wanted to go. After so much time waiting, so many days, weeks, months and years of chasing him, the other man was finally his, and he had refused to let that go.

However when things got serious he had left right in the middle of the night when he got the call, the only prove of his reluctance being the long kiss he gave to the sleeping form of his lover.

He had arrived too late, but by the time he did, he was no longer the selfish little brat he had been a few years before. Men and women that had known him for a long time and seen him behave like a careless spoiled child were surprised to see him on the streets of Kyoto refusing to fool around and going straight from the airport to the family's temple... his temple from now on.

He assumed his responsibilities as a monk immediately, with no complains and efficiency, proving to all those who had thought he wouldn't be able to deal with the burden wrong. He was officially approved as a monk and recognized by the same old men that had feared he would ruin the temple's renown or, even worst, reveal their darkest secrets, as Tatsuha had known them all.

The black haired man, however, did none. He had even taken over the ceremony at his father's funeral with his siblings, directing them on the old ways they had long forgotten.

Five months latter he still stood there, alone in the big house, praying and taking care of everything just as his father had before him, and the father of his father, and so on.

Yet... not a day passed without him dreaming of the –what was it now?- red haired man. He read all about him on the paper at high hours in the night in his old bedroom, just like he did when he was a teenager... there was just something wrong with thinking about the singer while staying on the room his father had occupied.

Tatsuha had only seen him once ever since he had left, during the funeral. They had not exchanged a word, not even to greet each other. Only stolen glances before the ceremony and the brief grazing of their hands proving it had really happened, they had really been together, if only for a little while.

Finally, after months and months of patient wait, we was able to meet him. In a sudden burst of rebellion, just like he had felt years before all the time, he left the temple in the middle of the week to find the singer, while trying to figure if he was still his lover after such a long time.

Ryuichi had been there, in the living room, wearing that provocative clothing of his, having not aged a day, looking as if he had been waiting for him to arrive. As if it had only been a couple of hours and not the agonizing seven months the time they had spent away from each other.

The twenty two year old man had restrained himself from jumping to his idol-lover arms and had stood on the doorway for a second, devouring every feature and every line of the body being offered so willingly to him.

A second passed and he was there, kissing him so fiercely he almost feared he would hurt the older man, touching him, claiming the territory that had been always his, ever since that night his sister had dragged him to see her boyfriend's new band ten years before.

Low sounds of pleasure filled the room, a pair of hot hands caressed his back... just as he remembered it had been then first time.

The game continued for a couple of minutes, before the singer bit his left ear, just as he always did... and Tatsuha realized something.

In his dreams, everything was perfect again, he was still a young man without any other worry that getting close to this man, this unreachable god that always stood too high for him to catch.

In his dreams, they had hot, passionate sex over and over again, and in the morning he had no temple to go to.

In his dreams... in his dreams he was again in that roller coaster that was Ryuichi Sakuma, childish genius and somehow dark man that never ceased to amaze him, to captivated him...

The man underneath him wasn't that anymore. The apartment wasn't all that amazing, the hot hands scratching softly his back were no longer desirable, the bites on his ear were no longer amusing.

The dream was over, the illusion was gone.

Tatsuha walked to the doorway as he fixed slightly his clothes. There was no need to stay there anymore, and just as the time before, he left without saying goodbye, though they both knew that's what it was. He left the spare key on a table and, after stopping for a moment, a bunch of unopened letters that had been resting on the pocket of his coat.

He had feared those letters... and now he knew why. Tatsuha hadn't wanted to go... but he had left before he even realized it.

Childhood was finally over, it was time to grow up.
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